To the GODDESS of DISCORD.

Dread Sovereign,

i have been sagacious enough of late, to discover that some evil-minded persons have insinuated to your highness, that I am utterly unmindful of your Ladyship’s importance; and that my time, as well as my talents, was wholly taken up in paying my divoto to your most implacable enemy and strenuous opposer, viz. the Goddess of Concord; which representation is as false as it is ill-natured; for your Ladyship may believe me without hesitation, when I assure you on the word of an honest man, that knowing your Ladyship to be of a very captious disposition, I have always been very careful of trespassing on your grounds for fear of incuring your displeasure, so far as to excite you to take vengeance (which is well known to be your darling attribute.)

I have likewise been informed, that some of my most implacable enemies are some of your Majesty’s privy-council; and that your Majesty’s Secretary at war, viz. Lord Jargon, was about to send some of your other Lords in waiting, viz. Lord second, Lord 7th, Lord 9th, alias Lord 2d, junior, with some others, to beat a tattoo upon the drum of my ear, with so great a number of contra-vibrations, without the intervention of a single coincidence, and with so much Forte as to dislocate my auditory; upon which information I called a court of Harmony, the result of which was, to repel force by force; and we had even proceeded so far as to order Lord Consonance, our Secretary at peace, to furnish our life-guard with an infinite number of coincidences, without the intervention of one contra-vibration; and although we have the majority on our side, yet we held it in scorn to take any advantage from our numbers, therefore we had selected an equal number of those who had attained unto the first three, viz. Lord Unison, Lord Diapente, Lord Octave, alias Lord Unison, jun’r, and for their Aid-de camps, we had chosen two twin brothers, viz. Major and Minor Trio, together with Major Sixth, &c. We had proceeded thus far, when in turning over a very antient history, I met with the following passage, viz. “by wise council thou shalt make thy war, and in multitude of councellors there is safety” Upon reading this passage I was resolved to enlarge the council, therefore we made choice of king Solomon, the son of David (but as he nor his father was never known to traverse your territories I suppose you have no knowledge of them). The result of our second council was to lay aside this enterprize and proceed in a very different manner; for by consulting this great councellor, we were convinced “that wisdom is better than weapons of war.”

Therefore it was resolved, that I singly should begin the attack in the common form of dedications, and besiege you with flattery, & if that should fail, as we have brib’d over a number of your nobility, we are determined to turn their force against you, and then we assure ourselves of success; but perhaps I trespass on your patience in this ambiguous preamble: know then dread Sovereign, that I have composed the following piece out of such materials as your kingdom is made up of, and without vanity, I believe you will readily grant that it is the best piece that ever was composed: this I chearfully offer at your shrine; and I must take the liberty to tell your Majesty that I expect this one piece will fully compensate for my former delinquency and remissness to you ward; and that you will not be so unreasonable as to insist on another oblation from me, neither through time nor eternity; and let me tell you, that in this offering I followed the example of our native indians, who sacrifice to the angry God much oftner than to the good-natured one; not from a principle of love, but of fear; for although you could never excite my love, you have frequently caused me to fear and tremble; and I solemnly declare, that I dread your extempore speeches more than I do the threats and menaces of all the crowned heads in Europe; and now madam, after this candid and honest confession, I must insist on your signing the following receipt, which for your honor and my security, I shall always carry about me.

A RECEIPT.

received of the Author, a piece of Jargon,26 it being the best piece ever composed, in full of all accounts from the beginning of time, to and through the endless ages of eternity. I say received by me, Goddess of Discord.

given from our inharmonical Cavern, in the land of Chaos; from the year of our existence, (which began at Adam’s fall) Five Thousand Seven Hundred and Eighty Two.

DEMON DREAD, Speaker.

Haman Horror, Secretary.

Attest,

And now Madam Crossgrain, after informing you that this receipt shall be my discharge, I shall be so condescending as to acquaint your uglyship, that I take great pleasure in subscribing myself your most inveterate, most implacable, most irreconcilable enemy,

The AUTHOR.

In order to do this piece ample justice, the concert must be made of vocal and instrumental music. Let it be performed in the following manner, viz. Let an Ass bray the bass, let the fileing of a saw carry the Tenor, let a hog who is extream hungry squeel the counter, and let a cart-wheel, which is heavy loaded, and that has been long without grease, squeek the treble; and if the concert should appear to be too feeble you may add the cracking of a crow, the howling of a dog, the sqalling of a cat; and what would grace the concert yet more, would be the rubbing of a wet finger upon a window glass. This last mentioned instrument no sooner salutes the drum of the ear, but it instantly conveys the sensation to the teeth; and if all these in conjunction should not reach the cause, you may add this most inharmonical of all sounds, “Pay me that thou owest.”

An Encomium on Music.27

perhaps some of my graver Readers may conclude, I am possessed with a Musical Enthusiasm, if I insist too much upon the marvelous.—That I am a Musical Enthusiast I readily grant, and I think it is impossible for any of it’s true Votaries to be otherwise; for when we consider the many wonderful effects which music has upon the animal spirits, and upon the nervous system, we are ready to cry out in a fit of Enthusiasm!—Great art thou o music! and with thee there is no competitor: Thy powers by far transcend the powers of physic, and the reception of thee is far more grateful than the nauseous drugs of the Apothecary; thou art as early as the creation; for when the foundation of the earth was laid, the morning stars sang together, and shouted for joy;28 Thou wast found in the mouths of the children of Israel, after their miraculous deliverance from the adamantine king of Egypt;29 Thou wast ever present with the Royal Psalmest, who for his uprightness was called the man after God’s own heart: Thou wast present at the dedication of that glorious house, built by King Solomon, when the glory of God filled the whole House;30 Thou wast the only weapon found in the hands and in the mouths of King Jehosaphat and the men of Judah, when the children of Ammon, Moab, and Mount-Seir fled from before them, destroying each other:31 Thou wast with Paul and Silas, when the prison doors were marvelously opened, by a great earth-quake:32 Thou wast invoked by the angelic host to celebr[a]te the birth of our saviour; for scarce was the glad tidings revealed to the wondering Shepherds, but glory to God, peace on earth, and good will towards men, was chanted by the joyful messengers.33

“O how shall men forbear to sing,

“When earth with Angel’s Notes do ring.”

But what adds still more to thy dignity, thou wast present with our Savior and his Disciples at the supper:34 In fine thou art ever known to accompany good men at all times, and in all ages. But we would not avail ourselves of the heathenish or ficticious accounts of Orpheus, whose music is said to animate the inanimate creation; but we will confine ourselves to well authenticated facts: For by thy aid King David was impowered to drive away the evil spirit from Saul:35 Thou art able to extract the poison from the venomous bite of the Tarantula, which baffles the skill of the Physician: Thou canst remove pain, and restore rest to the weary: Thou canst make stammering people pronounce distinctly, and without hesitation:36 Thou canst convert cowardise into Heroism, and inspire the pusilanimous with true magnanimity: Thou art celestial and thy birth divine; to what shall I liken thee? Thou canst not be described by Hieroglyphicks, for they are but types and shadows; whereas thou art in thyself an essential good: To what shall I liken thee? O Extatic! I have found a simile:—Thou art like pure Love, and true friendship. But alas! The purest earthly love is imbittered with groundless jealousy, and the truest friendship is tainted with unjust suspicions. But in Heaven there is pure love without alloy, and true friendship without dissimulation: Therefore thou art like Heaven and Heaven is like Thee.

1 See The New-England Psalm-Singer, p. 15; The Continental Harmony, p. xx–xxi.

2 For more on tempo see David P. McKay and Richard Crawford, William Billings of Boston (Princeton: Princeton University Press, 1975), p. 241–45.

3 See The Singing Master’s Assistant, Lesson X, p. 16.

4 The introductory matter in Billings’s publications, however, appears with original spelling and punctuation.

1 For the Notes, Rests, and other Characters, see page 103. [In the original the examples using musical notation are engraved on p. 103–04; in the present edition they are interpolated into the text.]

2 And here it may not be amiss to inform you, how the length of Pendulums are calculated; take this instance, suppose a Pendulum, of thirty-nine inches and two tenths, will vibrate in the time of a second, then divide 39²/₁₀ by 4, and it will give you the length of a Pendulum, that will vibrate twice as quick; and, multiply 39²/₁₀ by 4, and it will give the length of a Pendulum, that will vibrate twice as slow. Make a Pendulum of common thread well waxed and instead of a bullet take a piece of heavy wood turned perfectly round, about the bigness of a pullet’s egg, and rub them over, either with chalk, paint, or whitewash, so that they may be plainly seen by candle light.

3 [4th edition: “twenty-two inches and one twentieth.” In the later Continental Harmony (1794) Billings reiterates the measurement of 22 ¹/₂₀ inches, making the figure in the 4th edition appear to be his last thought.]

4 [4th edition: “almost out of use in Vocal Musick.”]

5 [4th edition: “by even Numbers.”]

6 [Billings seems to have meant: “could be perswaded to leave the practice of music to such as have.”]

7 In fuging Music you must be very distinct and emphatic, not only in the Tune, but in the pronounciation; for if there happens to be a Number of greater Voices in the Concert than your own, they will swallow you up; therefore in such a case, I would recommend to you the resolution (tho’ not the impudence) of a discarded Actor, who after he had been twice hissed off the Stage, mounted again, and with great Assurance he thundered out these words “I will be heard.”

8 I have heard it remarked that “Order was the first thing which took place in Heaven.”

9 It is recorded in sacred writ, that while I was in Embryo “The morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy.” And that Miriam and the children of Israel sang praises to God; but I suppose it was by immediate inspiration, or some supernatural assistance; for I frankly confess they had no assistance from me.

10 The wise man says, that “to every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the sun.” And the Royal Psalmist says, “I will sing of mercy and of judgment,” surely, this holy example is wortky [worthy] our imitation, and if we are authorised to sing both of mercy and of judgment, we may sing day and night without ceasing; for the prophet Jeremiah tells us, that his mercies are new every morning; and in another place, he says “righteous art thou O Lord, yet let me talk with thee of thy judgments.” It remains then, that we “Bless the Lord at all times, and let his praise be continually in our mouths.”

11 This Dominant Tone, is typical of a strong faith of which David seems to avail himself, and upon this strength he (in the language of a Christian hero) most emphatically expresses himself, in the following words, “The Lord is on my side, I will not fear what man can do unto me.” And again, “Though an host should encompass me about, yet I will not be affraid; for I will go on in the strength of the Lord my God.”

12 A Canon is a sort of musical composition variously composed and performed.

13 The Tone which was chosen by King Jehoshaphat’s army was this, viz. “Praise the Lord, for his mercy endureth forever.” It is worthy of notice, that the canon was pointed towards heaven, and not towards the enemy. And farther it has been observed, that whenever the Israelites were not furnished with this kind of artillery, they were easily vanquished by their enemies.

14 Philosophers agree, that there is a natural propensity in every sonorous body to reply (by way of echo) to any sounding body in unison with itself; and it is well known that the deeper the tone, the greater the tremor. Hence it is, that cannon[s] by reason of their extream depth, affect the air so sensibly.

15 Historians relate, that “Pythagoras, in passing by a Smith’s shop, found that the sounds proceeding from the hammers, were either more grave, or accute, according to the different weights of the hammers. The Philosopher, to improve this hint, suspends different weights by strings of the same bigness, and found in like manner, that the sounds answered to the weights. This being discovered, he found out those numbers which produced sounds, that were consonant: as that two strings of the same substance and tension, the one being double to the other in length gave that interval, which is called a Diapason. The same was also effected from two strings of the same length and size, the one having four times the tension of the other. By these steps from so mean a beginning did this great man reduce what was only noise before, to one of the most delightful sciences, by marrying it to the Mathematicks.” Note, that Pythagoras was born in Samos, 524 years before Christ.

16 Guido lived about 710 years ago. He was a great improver of the Musical Scale: He caused it to be called Gamut, that it might begin with the first letter of his name. Historians relate, that he was born in Tuscany.

17 The sharp Keys are ranked in the Masculine Gender; therefore, Dame Gamut calls them her sons.

18 By this, is understood the Fife and Drum, and other martial instruments of music.

19 The flat Keys (by way of contrast to the Sharp) are ranked in the Feminine Gender. N.B. These Genders admit no neuter.

20 I had almost forgot to inform you, that some of my sons are wholly employed in making pills, to purge melancholly; and as I have no desire to keep this salutary preparation a secret, I here present you with the receipt, verbatim. “Take of Bass, Tenor, Counter, and Treble, each an equal proportion; mix them in a Vehicle of Consonance, with as great a number of Vibrations, as will amount to a Coincidence. Let this be conveyed into the ears, through the medium of vociforation and articulation; and it will not fail of having the desired effect.” Approved.

21 By these remarks, the absurdity of adapting a sharp keyed tune, to a Psalm of Penitence and Prayer, and a flat keyed tune, to a Psalm of Praise and Thanksgiving, is strikingly set forth. Suppose a preacher, on a fast day morning, for his discourse, should speak from these words, viz. “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise.” And for the afternoon, “Go your way, eat the fat, and drink the sweet, and send portions unto them for whom nothing is prepared; neither be ye sorry, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” We will carry this supposition yet farther, and suppose, that in his great wisdom, he should on a thanksgiving day morning, speak from these words, viz. “A day of darkness and gloominess, a day of clouds and thick darkness.” And in the afternoon, “Let neither man nor beast, herd nor flock taste any thing; let them not feed nor drink water; but let man and beast be covered with sack cloth.” But says the impartial reader, “this is ridiculous, this would be intolerable; but is the simile just, is it not exaggerated”? “I answer, it is just, and without exaggeration.”

22 Note, that every piece of music is called an Air.

23 History informs us, that Dr. De Maris, a Frenchman, was the first that invented and ascertained the length of the notes, and their proportion from each other, viz. “That the Semibreve is twice as long as the Minim; the Minim twice as long as the Crotchet, &c.[”] N.B. He lived about the year 1330.

24 Alluding to Revelations, Chapter 6, “There shall be time no longer.”

25 As penitence and prayer, are not mentioned as the business of Heaven; but are supposed to be swallowed up in praise and thanksgiving; so Dame Gammut may with propriety say, that “her daughters will be extinct, and her sons rise and shine, &c.”

26 See page 102 [p. 263].

27 [After “To the goddess of discord” comes “An Alphabetical list of tunes and anthems, contained in this Book.” This is followed, in all except the fourth edition, by “An Encomium on Music” and, preceding the musical section, six stanzas of “A morning hymn. To be sung in the Tune called Aurora.”]

28 Job 38 chap, verse 7.

29 Exod. 15, verse 1.

30 2 Chron. 5 chap, verse 13.

31 2 Chron. 20 chap, verse 21–22.

32 Acts 16, verse 25–26.

33 Luke 2, verse 13–14.

34 Matth. 26–30.

35 i. Sam. 16 chap. verse 23.

36 To illustrate this I shall I [sic] take this opportunity to inform the reader, that I am intimately acquainted with several singers, who are not able to speak one short sentence in common conversation, without stuttering and stammering to such a degree, as to excite great pain in the audience, and are often-times so confused and abashed at their own unintelligable jargon, that they are obliged to leave the meaning of the half uttered sentence to the sagacity of the hearers: When to great admiration, these same people will perform n [a] lengthy piece of music, and they will not only sing musically and delightfully, but they will pronounce with the accuracy of a scholar, without the least hesitation whatever: Upon the strength of such conviction, who can forbear breaking out into the following exclamation “Great art thou O music, and with thee there is no Competitor—Thy powers are far beyond the powers of—utterance.”

1 [Footnote 2 below gives Billings’s characterization of this essay as a “burlesque.” It appears at the end of the introduction to The Singing Master’s Assistant, fourth edition, where it is preceded by a short version of the Introduction to the earlier editions. The item of which this is Billings’s parody is printed on p. 141–43 of The Heidelbergh Catechism, bound with The Psalms of David . . . for the use of the Reformed Protestant Dutch Church of the city of New York (New York: James Parker, 1767), Evans 10561, under the title: “The Creed, of Saint Athanasius, Bishop of Alexandria, Written in the Year of our Lord, 333.”]

2 ☞ I hope no pious Episcopalian will so far misconstrue my intention, as to suppose this is intended as a burlesque upon their form of Devotion: I was pleased with the stile, and wrote this by way of Imitation.

3 Composers of Musick say,

“Could you erect a thousand parts or more,

“They, in effect, will prove the same as four.”

*Titles with an asterisk (*) are not by Billings and are not included in this edition. Royalston is “by Wood.”