Relation of Hephzibah Crosby, [April 9, 1749]1

Introduction

Hepzibah Crosby was born on October 17, 1727, the daughter of David and Sarah Crosby of Billerica, a town about thirty-five miles from Westborough.2 The records are silent on when and why she came to Westborough, although her parents had moved to the neighboring town of Shrewsbury.3 As Ebenezer Parkman noted on one occasion, “I rode up to Mr. David Crosbys in Shrewsbury to get him to make me a pair of Boots” (Aug. 17, 1738).4 If David Crosby were a cordwainer, that occupation may not have provided much security or prospects for Hepzibah, the eldest of the Crosbys’ twelve children.5 As was the case for many young persons in eighteenth-century New England, the search for work and opportunity may have been at the root of her appearance in Westborough.

Whatever her motives and circumstances, Hepzibah Crosby first appeared in Parkman’s diary at the age of 20 when, as a member of Capt. John Maynard’s household, she had fallen ill (Sept. 9, 1748).6 In her relation to the church, she mentioned “a fit of Sickness” by which she was “brought low.” Several months later she “watch’d” with Hannah Parkman after the birth of Hannah’s son Breck (Feb. 5, 1749).7 Later that month Parkman noted that Hepzibah had been there “some Days spinning,” and she was still there a week later (Feb. 25, Mar. 1, 1749). Hepzibah talked with Parkman “about her making a profession” and “about her joining with the Church” (Mar. 3, 10, 1749). She was at his home again several weeks later and was admitted to the church on April 9, but Parkman did not mention when he examined her knowledge or spiritual experience, when she was propounded for admission, or when he received her relation, a document that he “received from her partly in writing, and partly from her own Mouth.”8

At the age of 21, Hepzibah thus became a full member of the church, fitting into a pattern that was common for young women who frequently joined the church before or soon after marriage. She undoubtedly already knew 22-year-old Benjamin Whipple whom she married four months later (Aug. 7, 1749).9 Whipple was born in Ipswich, the oldest of Francis and Abigail Whipple’s ten children.10 The Whipple family had come to Westborough in the early 1730s, with Francis and Abigail being dismissed from the Third Church in Ipswich and admitted into the Westborough church on January 6, 1734.11

Benjamin first appeared in Parkman’s diary when he was 14 years old, mowing the ministerial meadow (July 15–16, 1740). Later work for Parkman included hoeing, raking, and cutting wood.12 Although Benjamin had been baptized in Ipswich, he did not join the Westborough church, thus fitting into a common pattern for young men who rarely joined the church before marriage. But he did belong to a young men’s society whose membership Parkman vetted (Mar. 11, 1745; May 4, 1749).

Soon after their marriage Hepzibah and Benjamin moved to Hardwick, where their first child, Nehemiah, was born on March 25, 1750.13 Hepzibah received a dismissal to the Hardwick church on November 4, 1750,14 and Benjamin, now married and a father, joined the church.

Why the move to Hardwick? It would be tempting to suggest that they were part of the separatist movement that, most noticeably, persuaded members of the Fay family to leave Westborough and settle in Hardwick.15 While the records are silent on the motivation of Benjamin and Hepzibah in moving to Hardwick, they may have been seeking less spiritual opportunities. Hardwick was a newer town and may have had more abundant and less expensive land. Perhaps also important was a family connection: Benjamin’s younger sister, Lucia or Lucy, had moved to Hardwick after her marriage to Moses Pratt.16

The separatists in Harwick became dissatisfied with the Hardwick church, and in mid-July 1749 the church voted to send to three ministers, including Jonathan Edwards, to advise them whether to dismiss the separatists “or proceed to censure them as irregular, disorderly members.”17 In 1753, at the relatively young age of twenty-six, Benjamin Whipple was chosen as a member of a committee that sought a reconciliation with the Hardwick separatists. Whatever his role in that committee, Benjamin was eventually persuaded that the separatists’ understanding and vision of a godly church were correct, and his name, along with that of Hepzibah, appears on the list of those who signed the separatists’ covenant.18 When Whipple visited Parkman in 1755, the minster noted that Whipple had “become a Separate at Lambs Town. I had Some free Talk with him upon it” (Oct. 20, 1755).19

While the Whipples found a spiritual home with the separatists, Hardwick did not long remain their earthly home. Within a few years they moved yet again, taking their seven children in a journey that led the separatists to what became Bennington, Vermont, where they helped to found the first church in Vermont. While the Whipples were in Bennington, their last two children were born. But all was not well among the separatists in Bennington who, almost from the start, were themselves divided. “By 1780,” writes Douglas L. Winiarski, “fewer than half the families in Bennington remained affiliated with the town’s shattered religious institution.”20 Hepzibah and Benjamin Whipple were undoubtedly among those who were disaffected, and so they moved yet again, this time to Rutland, Vermont, where, in 1785, they joined what became the First Congregational Church.21 Celebrated as a “SAINT” on her gravestone, Hepzibah died on May 16, 1797;22 Benjamin joined her nine years later.23

The Relation

Received from her partly in writing, and partly from her own Mouth.

I believe that there is but one God over all, who made and governs all Things according to his own Will; and that this one God is in 3 Persons, Father, son and holy Ghost: I believe that as I was born, so I must dye, and that I shall rise again at the last Day to Judgment. I bless God I was born in this Land of Gospel Light, and of religious Parents that gave me up to God in Baptism, while I was young and that they taught me the true Religion: that I have had the word of God to read, and that I have had the word preached to me from Time to Time; that by these Means there has been shewn to me the lost Condition I am in by Nature, and that the only way for me who am a sinner to become Justifyed and righteous before God is only by the Merits of Christ’s Blood—if I shall not be found pardond and justifyed throught [sic] Christ in the great Day I must perish for ever. Therefore I desire to accept of Him as He is offered in the Gospel to be my Prophet to teach, my Priest to atone Divine Justice for me, my King to rule in and reign over me.

I have for Some Time had a Desire to come to the Table of the Lord for He has Said do This in Remembrance of me, but knowing my own unworthiness I was afraid—but then being awakend by the word and providences of God, I am resolved humbly to come and give up my self to God and his people. It pleased God to visit me of late with a fit of Sickness and I was brought low, but He helped me: In my Distress I cryed unto the Lord and He heard my Cry and He deliverd me from going down to the Pit. What Shall I render unto the Lord for all His Benefits towards Me? I will take the Cup of Salvation and call upon the Name of the Lord, I will pay my vows unto the Lord now in the Presence of all his people. And by reading the holy Scriptures, especially that part of it that setts forth the Humiliations of Christ, his afflicted Life, Ps. 116.12. his bitter Death and suffering, and all to make Satisfaction to divine Justice for sinners, has been 13.14. very awakening to me and for my Encouragement. I have also found by reading his word in other parts of it very gracious Invitations to come as Isa: 55.1, Mat. 11.28, and onward—Rev. 22.17. Joh. 6.37, and many other places by which I have been induced to come.

But tho I have experiencd much Enlightening and humbling and been Some times been encourag’d yet I have had great Concern and been in great Trouble questioning myself whether I had been thorowly humbled before God, whether I have accepted Christ aright, and whether my Hope was not a vain Hope. I acknowledge, it is one Thing to say what one has heard or read or got by rote, and another thing what a person has really felt and experiencd; therefore I would not offer any thing but what I hope I have really found. For, not only has God been pleased to awaken me, and his holy Spirit has been Striving with me—but I have considerd the End God had in making me, that I might glorify Him what ever I can; and that God had such love to us as to send his son to dye for us when he had no need of us or any Thing we could do to make him any Thing more Glorious or happy. These having deeply affected me, I hope it is not Merely from Fear of Misery, or Desire of Happiness, but I hope out of a sense of Duty and Gratitude, from an hatred of sin and regard to Holiness, that I would come to Him: and I hope I have been brought to see that no Dutys or Goodness of mine can justifie me before God: and having Seen the readiness and willingness of Christ to receive them that come to Him, I hope I find my Self willing to come and accept of Him.

There is a great Difference between giving the Hand (in profession) and giving the Heart to the Lord. I think I have a Willingness to give up my self wholly to the Lord, there being no better way of disposing of my self than to devote my self, soul and Body to Him the remainder of my Days here; to bind my self, and to Seal my Bonds to him. I have considerd my Baptism also and the very solemn Bonds thereof and that it is a throwing away my Baptism if I do not come to this. I desire to be truely humbled for my Neglects of the Duty of giving my self up to God, in time past. Indeed I have often thought I did do this; tho not without fear whether I was Sincere—but I find there must be a full and intire Resolution—and ought to be able to appeal to God that knows all Things that it is in Uprightness of Heart. I have also often thought how strict those ought to walk who so solemnly bind themselves: but I trust the Thought of binding my self to do what in me lyes will be no sufficient Pull-back to me; for tho I can do nothing of my self, yet by the Help of God’s Grace I would humbly Engage—not without fear lest if I be left to my self, I should dishonor God and bring a Scandal to this high and holy Profession.

Upon the whole, I humbly ask admittance among You, and whatsoever any body hath at any Time seen amiss in Me, I earnestly ask their forgiveness of, and I desire humbly to put my self under the Government of this Church requesting your kind and faithfull Watch over Me at all Times; and I ask your Prayers for me that I may walk agreeable to these solemn Engagements; and that I may not only be a Member of the visible Church here, but that I may at last sit down with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the Kingdom of Heaven, and drink of that Wine that is ever New with God in Glory.

Hepzibah Crosby